You’re a man, so there is a good chance you haven’t seen the romantic comedy Father Of The Bride’ however you should give it a go, especially if you are a Dad surrounded by girls!
In a world that strives for gender equality though, do you really need to worry about connecting with your sons and daughters in different ways? Or should can a Dad’s relationship with his ‘little princess’ be just the same as the one he has with his ‘chip off the old block’
The answer is yes. Your role as Dad is to provide the exact same thing that might not come so easily to Mum. Of course there are loads of single parents out there but they all say the same thing. That trying to be both is impossible. Some situations call for a mother’s touch and others require a father’s advice. So embrace your role and be exactly the same towards both your children.
This is cool, because it means you don’t have to dress up like a fairy or play with dolls just because you have daughters. Nope, this is the modern world my friend so let’s look at some of the awesome things you can share with both your children and what you are teaching them depending on their gender.
Firstly, the game ALL Dad’s should be teaching their children. Baseball.
Not only is Baseball one of the coolest games in the United States of America but it is also so completely simple to enjoy and can be played with no more than two people. All you need is a good quality baseball glove like one of these thebaseballdiamond.com/shoeless-joe-gloves-take-your-game-to-the-next-level and a bat which you can buy in pretty much every sports shop across America.
So what are you teaching your kids through this simple game of bat and catch. First and foremost you are teaching both your kids that sport shouldn’t have a gender divide. That if you love something and want to have fun then you should pick up a glove and play. You are teaching your daughters to be confident and strong and teaching your sons that girls aren’t all useless at baseball (unless they are useless and then you are teaching your sons to play anyway because it’s not all about the winning)
As a combined effort you are teaching them both to get out in the fresh air and that Pokemon Go doesn’t count as fun outdoors.
You know that project car that is in your garage? The one you were saving for you and your son? Except you have three daughters and are too exhausted to try again? Well that right there, is a daughter Dad project crying for some attention.
The world is short of female engineers which is a shame because this article https://www.engineergirl.org/Engineers/HistoricalEngineers.aspx highlight how good women are! They are precise and deliberate with a natural ability to problem solve on their feet. They are born survivors who refuse to give up (you must have noticed this if you have three girls and a wife at home!)
Don’t shy away from including your girls in your garage and making this a Dad only zone. Even if they start just by sitting at your side in a high chair then develop into passing you things as you work underneath the car, you are engaging their interest without them even realising. Pretty soon you might find they are helping you with simple repairs and giving you advice because they have taken in things you have been doing that you have missed. Eventually you might even have shaped them so much they share your passion and the Father / Son project is now your daughter and you building her first car. Together.
You are teaching your daughter that there is no divide. She can do whatever she wants if she puts her mind to it. You are helping her to understand that it’s ok to be different, in fact it’s pretty cool to be different. On top of that you will have spent hours of time getting a different angle on her life issues and giving her a little bit of the male perspective.
Talking of male perspective, if you really want to up your Dad game then you need to get involved with a little bit of man education. Don’t shy away from those birds and the bees talks. Or go really quiet when the mention of a first boyfriend comes. You need to show your kids that a man deals with girls in a respectful way and teach your boys how to listen to girls.
There is a huge focus on educating girls on how to protect themselves from domestic violence, rape, pregnancy and such like but this isn’t how it should pan out. Sit down with both your daughters and your sons and teach them how to respect each other. Teach your boys that women are completely equal and show them that buy treating your daughters the same way you treat your boys. Show them both that whilst they should celebrate their differences that neither one of them is more privileged than the other and allow that to also grow naturally by sharing the same interests wherever you can. If you have a younger daughter and a teenage son, get him involved in silly games with dolls and show him there is nothing wrong with being tender. Then let them rough it out on the football pitch and don’t over protect your daughter, let them find the balance with each other.
Being a Dad is one of the most awesome jobs in the worlds so don’t sweat over how to treat your girls or your boys. Just have fun, enjoy yourself and be proud of them every single day. The most important thing is that you are there, spending time with them and shaping them into positive and healthy young adults.
And next time you hear someone say “Who’s the Daddy?” Make sure you tell them loud, you are.
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