Over the next few months school became normal, it was easy and he really enjoyed going and made some good friends. Here is where the tough parenting began; one day after picking him up from school he told me that one of the other children hit him. He told me that he was playing with a toy and when the other child tried to take it from him he said no, and then the other child hit him. I asked him if he told the teacher, he said yes. Then another day he told me it happened again. At first I was upset that the other child did this, but after a few minutes I became upset for a different reason.
We have always taught our son that hitting other people is wrong and that he shouldn’t hit. I spoke to the teacher about this situation and learned that the other child is not as socially advanced and has a hard time communicating his feelings so he hits. This being said my heart goes out to this child however does that make it ok to hit my son? The answer is absolutely not! Here lies the problem, I don’t want my son to think you solve all conflicts by fighting or hitting but I also will not allow him to be bullied. So I have taught my son that he is always to use words first & make sure he lets the teacher know what is happening, especially if another person is trying to hit him. If after the teacher speaks with the other child they hit him again, he is to HIT THEM BACK. Yeah I said it I told my 3 year old son that it is ok to defend himself and never to let someone hit him. I know a lot of people will criticize my decision but I refuse to raise children that are afraid to stand up for themselves or their family & friends!
So in the end what I thought would be the hardest part – picking the right place & simply going to school ended up being the easiest. Dropping him off was terrible but it wasn’t even close to the feeling you have when you realize that your child isn’t standing up for their self & is being hit by another child when you weren’t there to protect them. But I guess its all part of being a parent whether I like it or not. I wish life were as easy as the professionals make it seem when they say that you shouldn’t teach your child to resort to violence. But it’s not, there are people out there that don’t teach their children to use their words and not hit & those children through no fault of their own will hit your child. But I will not raise my sons to be bullied or victims. After this incident I did and will always teach my sons to defend themselves, just the same as their father or mother would do if we are put in the situation. I hope you and your child never have to go through this situation, however make sure you prepare yourself & them in case they do!
Have your children been in a similar situation?
When my daughter is in grade school, she has a lot of complaints about her schoolmates being super active that even hitting the other one seems like a normal scenario to them. Some girls as even as much as hyperactive as the boys. Being raised with cousins and a few preschool classmates as her friend, I am confident that my kid doesn’t behave like her classmates do. So it almost shocked me when she told me one day that the teacher wants to speak with us and she didn’t told us the reason. I spoke to the teacher and she said my daughter hit somebody. I think my daughter was provoked so she slapped the other girl. The teacher knows my daughter well and she said my daughter is so much behaved that she always stays at her seat so she can’t believe the thing too. We can’t really predict what will happen so I think what you are teaching to your son is right. There is a saying that one is enough and two is too much and we better protect our own selves so it won’t happen again.